Us
I hope to use this blog as a daily record of Papa, Jesus and Holy Spirit's daily interventions in my life. They are quite daily! I don't want to travel backward, but present; not future, just today. May my every entry be clear.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Related
In the in-between time, I've been connecting family dots. I do genealogy, continuing ongoing research; a project 80 years long to date.
When typing in my database birth and death dates, I can rush past long lives in a few seconds. They fit in a cubicle. I copy and paste excerpts from biographies, census dates and those special ones who made the obscure count for something. We know being famous is overrated. We're all in that famous category in Heaven. Papa made each one of us significant and alive with purpose. But on earth, it takes a famous person to make the rest count.
In the US, we are all related to a few immigrants sharing a taste for freedom. Genealogy is the number one hobby in the world now. I wonder why. For me, it's fun to take my family and see how we all connect. Each family is unique in bloodlines. We have DNA testing for the very curious. It sure quiets disputes and rumors.
In 2010, DNA answered many questions in my Graves line. Elvis is my cousin. For me, it makes me want to take a closer look at him as a person. He also serves as another lead, a stepping stone in a huge pond, down the ancestry line. And he looks a lot like my daughter :)
Agnes Sanford is also my cousin. I first recognized her by the familiarity of her writings. I wanted to get a good look at her and quickly found a web pic. Wow. She looks just like me. I traced her line no further than her mother and found the Graves name. I'm getting good at recognizing facial structures. A Graves reunion of 300 relatives showed me stark, expressive commonalities over the years. Agnes is so fun to be related to. She began the inner healing movement in the 60s. I've been involved heavily in it from 2000 to present. Everything we do in Christendom is based in her work, from Cleansing Stream to Elijah House to Bethel's ministry in Redding, to Vineyard Christian Fellowships, and on it goes globally. Agnes was healed one day and was never the same.
Whatever draws our interest, Papa takes us deep into good things. Wisdom is gained and we see our uniqueness and Papa's orchestration in granting life, an incomprehensible story.
For this work, I've laid aside the book I so want to finish writing. I'm drawn to the revelation of secrets and Papa's inner workings. I know I need to take a break from the genealogy and hunker down, Papa style, and write with Him the ending of MT2. There is nothing more refreshing than writing this way.
When typing in my database birth and death dates, I can rush past long lives in a few seconds. They fit in a cubicle. I copy and paste excerpts from biographies, census dates and those special ones who made the obscure count for something. We know being famous is overrated. We're all in that famous category in Heaven. Papa made each one of us significant and alive with purpose. But on earth, it takes a famous person to make the rest count.
In the US, we are all related to a few immigrants sharing a taste for freedom. Genealogy is the number one hobby in the world now. I wonder why. For me, it's fun to take my family and see how we all connect. Each family is unique in bloodlines. We have DNA testing for the very curious. It sure quiets disputes and rumors.
In 2010, DNA answered many questions in my Graves line. Elvis is my cousin. For me, it makes me want to take a closer look at him as a person. He also serves as another lead, a stepping stone in a huge pond, down the ancestry line. And he looks a lot like my daughter :)
Agnes Sanford is also my cousin. I first recognized her by the familiarity of her writings. I wanted to get a good look at her and quickly found a web pic. Wow. She looks just like me. I traced her line no further than her mother and found the Graves name. I'm getting good at recognizing facial structures. A Graves reunion of 300 relatives showed me stark, expressive commonalities over the years. Agnes is so fun to be related to. She began the inner healing movement in the 60s. I've been involved heavily in it from 2000 to present. Everything we do in Christendom is based in her work, from Cleansing Stream to Elijah House to Bethel's ministry in Redding, to Vineyard Christian Fellowships, and on it goes globally. Agnes was healed one day and was never the same.
Whatever draws our interest, Papa takes us deep into good things. Wisdom is gained and we see our uniqueness and Papa's orchestration in granting life, an incomprehensible story.
For this work, I've laid aside the book I so want to finish writing. I'm drawn to the revelation of secrets and Papa's inner workings. I know I need to take a break from the genealogy and hunker down, Papa style, and write with Him the ending of MT2. There is nothing more refreshing than writing this way.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Obedient
There are all kinds of good definitions of the word "obedient." Mostly, one thinks of keeping traffic laws, or the child's role of obedience to parents.
But as believers in a good Papa with a mindset toward an awesome future for us, obedience choices come up in a variety of hard situations. I.e., you know what you should do, how you should be, how you should act, but the heart is breaking too. Sometimes others are not obedient, despising you, and that makes you vulnerable to a miserable reaction.
Obedience applied is turning the other cheek AND sincerely blessing the ones who despise you. Obedience is telling your flesh to be joyful in trouble and calling up and out of your spirit Papa's love, declaring good things for all who come near. Blessings uttered at such times are powerful ones; heartfelt and full of Papa's power from within, for they are uttered from a pure, yet broken heart. Its words are deep and mysteries are revealed, and glory is poured down on even the sayer. Heaven's joy permeates every pore as higher things then fill the mind, and we are healed.
I've seen pure-hearted obedience acted out between two pastors. One in terrible sin, hates the other. The other blessing his tormentor in return, 40 years now. A thorn in the flesh, the tormented pastor utters wonderful blessings on him in tears. I wonder if his global influence has more to do with his good testimony with this prickly pastor than it does with his actual ministry. Because of him, I know how to obey amidst torment. Of course, the blessing lavished on me from Papa in return is the best :)
But as believers in a good Papa with a mindset toward an awesome future for us, obedience choices come up in a variety of hard situations. I.e., you know what you should do, how you should be, how you should act, but the heart is breaking too. Sometimes others are not obedient, despising you, and that makes you vulnerable to a miserable reaction.
Obedience applied is turning the other cheek AND sincerely blessing the ones who despise you. Obedience is telling your flesh to be joyful in trouble and calling up and out of your spirit Papa's love, declaring good things for all who come near. Blessings uttered at such times are powerful ones; heartfelt and full of Papa's power from within, for they are uttered from a pure, yet broken heart. Its words are deep and mysteries are revealed, and glory is poured down on even the sayer. Heaven's joy permeates every pore as higher things then fill the mind, and we are healed.
I've seen pure-hearted obedience acted out between two pastors. One in terrible sin, hates the other. The other blessing his tormentor in return, 40 years now. A thorn in the flesh, the tormented pastor utters wonderful blessings on him in tears. I wonder if his global influence has more to do with his good testimony with this prickly pastor than it does with his actual ministry. Because of him, I know how to obey amidst torment. Of course, the blessing lavished on me from Papa in return is the best :)
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Social
Papa has been showing me all kinds of human interactions, exchanges, engagements. I get these visuals I want to be responsible with getting these social visuals out there.
Today, it was a social visual, comparing the first vision with this third one. In the first, it was people rolling around in their busy lives, bumping hamster balls, clunking off and ricochetting in another direction. The point was that their lives never interchanged.
Today's vision was of the same people, without the hamster balls, smacking into one another, getting bumped and bruised on occasion. Their skin overlapped, or else slightly permeated each other. That represented the investment of time we put into people. The bumps and bruises are the emotional depletion we feel when helping out someone in need. Especially if they are drained themselves on their own journey toward Papa. They've been taught wrong, or else hell has whispered lies about the good life Papa wants for us to have here on earth, that the good life is not specifically for them and they have been set aside for torture.
This last week has been spent with such a one. No wonder the Gospel is called the Good News :) One verse was enough to get him thinking: My yoke is easy; My burden, light." Papa is good all the time. Hell has told him a life of suffering is all he deserves. Good grief, hell, leave my brother alone, in Jesus' good name!
I'll take the bumps and bruises. Holy Spirit was there to help me relay to my brother what he needed badly to hear. The truth saves. My bumps and bruises come in the form of a headache. Here You go, Papa. Here's my headache. Thanks for the opportunity :)
Today, it was a social visual, comparing the first vision with this third one. In the first, it was people rolling around in their busy lives, bumping hamster balls, clunking off and ricochetting in another direction. The point was that their lives never interchanged.
Today's vision was of the same people, without the hamster balls, smacking into one another, getting bumped and bruised on occasion. Their skin overlapped, or else slightly permeated each other. That represented the investment of time we put into people. The bumps and bruises are the emotional depletion we feel when helping out someone in need. Especially if they are drained themselves on their own journey toward Papa. They've been taught wrong, or else hell has whispered lies about the good life Papa wants for us to have here on earth, that the good life is not specifically for them and they have been set aside for torture.
This last week has been spent with such a one. No wonder the Gospel is called the Good News :) One verse was enough to get him thinking: My yoke is easy; My burden, light." Papa is good all the time. Hell has told him a life of suffering is all he deserves. Good grief, hell, leave my brother alone, in Jesus' good name!
I'll take the bumps and bruises. Holy Spirit was there to help me relay to my brother what he needed badly to hear. The truth saves. My bumps and bruises come in the form of a headache. Here You go, Papa. Here's my headache. Thanks for the opportunity :)
Monday, December 13, 2010
Christmas 2010
What a great time to be in the 40 Days of Encounter! This is the season the whole world focuses on the holiday we all very well know is Jesus' birthday. I want to bring You, Jesus, along for the ride we know as Christmas rush. I don't want to stray because of the glitter, but crown You with it. Being preoccupied with Christmas is easy when the world is with me. Christmas is a glimpse into eternity where everyone celebrates the day sans presupposition. There is surely decorating and fun to be had on Jesus' birthday in Heaven. I love my Brother :)
Saturday, December 11, 2010
How He Loves Me - the song
I awoke this morning with this song in my mind. It is still with me. There is nothing like it today. I first heard it sung by daughter Amber, as she lay on the recliner, home from Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry in Redding, CA. The woman who wrote and sang that song is on the worship team there.
Women, Rise Up!
Kris Vallotton boldly declared Papa's most wonderful gift to this planet: Women. From the beginning it was so. Even how we were fashioned from the beginning is so awesome. I love it :)
So I have been digesting Kris Vallotton's words, Papa's Word about us, and I find that I have been waiting for permission to be who I am called to be -- by men! Ha.
We women would really like our men to come along on this awesome ride. Women are social beings and love the variety of our male company. We hate leaving our men in the spiritual dust; first our husbands, then the rest of their gender.
And if they don't come along? We just have to go it alone! It's okay to just go. Papa doesn't wait for our men when He takes us up on Heavenly cloud rides. It's okay. You have permission, women. Don't resent their disinterest. When you return with glory on your countenances, they'll peek into the clouds, just out of curiosity. I don't know why their interest stops there. Maybe it's because they have to make a living and think that's all they have time for. But we as women know Heaven merges with Earth, enriching, satisfying, and completing life.
Papa made Adam male and female out of dirt, like He did the animals. But He broke Adam in half and took the female half away to fashion into woman. Where this happened, we don't know. But He returned with Eve. Adam recognized her as having been part of him! He thought she was amazing! She is born to travel upward with Papa, wanting Him more and more.
This intense love for Papa is why Eve was deceived in the Garden of Eden. She didn't want to be Papa. On the contrary, she wanted to be nearer to Him by knowing Him better. The serpent told her she could do this by eating the forbidden fruit. When she brought the fruit to Adam, all excited for what the serpent said; for the fruit's potential to be closer to Papa, Adam knew that was a lie. Men were created to have this awesome relationship with Papa. Adam was already as high as he cold get with Papa. When Papa confronted Adam, Adam lied to Him, face to face, about what caused the change in the Garden, blaming Eve. "The woman YOU gave me, Papa, SHE did this." Adam blames Papa for his own sin.
But Papa loves Eve and knows she is special. He recognizes that His specially fashioned Eve was deceived. He saw that she was heartbroken and humiliated. Papa saw that all she wanted was more of Him. The serpent has done a terrible thing in his deceiving her. Adam is now subject to hard labor, well-deserved. He wants to be like Papa, well, let's show him he can never be like Papa. Eve is saved in childbirth. Papa knows she will eventually carry Him, as Jesus, inside her. Their relationship is preserved. Her wisdom is preserved. She was fashioned in Heaven's workshop.
All the unequal lopsidedness in man/woman relationship reveals itself in man's oppression of woman, coming from the man she can't help but love.
Is this a jealousy thing? "Her desire will be for her husband, and he will rule over her." All things being restored by Jesus' bloody death, our men can be restored as co-rulers with women. But men can't seem to get over the fact that they are physically stronger than women. Men can't be whole without women, yet men won't share equally with them, treating them as Jesus did, willing to die for them.
The church is female. Man was created both male and female. Man broke in half and is only half a man without his woman. He cannot see into Heaven without a woman's eyes. He must ride on her Heavenly spirit to see all that Papa is involved in from eternity to eternity.
I write all this from visions. I know it is true because verses permeate my mind as the visions unfold. I am so happy to be a woman :)
So I have been digesting Kris Vallotton's words, Papa's Word about us, and I find that I have been waiting for permission to be who I am called to be -- by men! Ha.
We women would really like our men to come along on this awesome ride. Women are social beings and love the variety of our male company. We hate leaving our men in the spiritual dust; first our husbands, then the rest of their gender.
And if they don't come along? We just have to go it alone! It's okay to just go. Papa doesn't wait for our men when He takes us up on Heavenly cloud rides. It's okay. You have permission, women. Don't resent their disinterest. When you return with glory on your countenances, they'll peek into the clouds, just out of curiosity. I don't know why their interest stops there. Maybe it's because they have to make a living and think that's all they have time for. But we as women know Heaven merges with Earth, enriching, satisfying, and completing life.
Papa made Adam male and female out of dirt, like He did the animals. But He broke Adam in half and took the female half away to fashion into woman. Where this happened, we don't know. But He returned with Eve. Adam recognized her as having been part of him! He thought she was amazing! She is born to travel upward with Papa, wanting Him more and more.
This intense love for Papa is why Eve was deceived in the Garden of Eden. She didn't want to be Papa. On the contrary, she wanted to be nearer to Him by knowing Him better. The serpent told her she could do this by eating the forbidden fruit. When she brought the fruit to Adam, all excited for what the serpent said; for the fruit's potential to be closer to Papa, Adam knew that was a lie. Men were created to have this awesome relationship with Papa. Adam was already as high as he cold get with Papa. When Papa confronted Adam, Adam lied to Him, face to face, about what caused the change in the Garden, blaming Eve. "The woman YOU gave me, Papa, SHE did this." Adam blames Papa for his own sin.
But Papa loves Eve and knows she is special. He recognizes that His specially fashioned Eve was deceived. He saw that she was heartbroken and humiliated. Papa saw that all she wanted was more of Him. The serpent has done a terrible thing in his deceiving her. Adam is now subject to hard labor, well-deserved. He wants to be like Papa, well, let's show him he can never be like Papa. Eve is saved in childbirth. Papa knows she will eventually carry Him, as Jesus, inside her. Their relationship is preserved. Her wisdom is preserved. She was fashioned in Heaven's workshop.
All the unequal lopsidedness in man/woman relationship reveals itself in man's oppression of woman, coming from the man she can't help but love.
Is this a jealousy thing? "Her desire will be for her husband, and he will rule over her." All things being restored by Jesus' bloody death, our men can be restored as co-rulers with women. But men can't seem to get over the fact that they are physically stronger than women. Men can't be whole without women, yet men won't share equally with them, treating them as Jesus did, willing to die for them.
The church is female. Man was created both male and female. Man broke in half and is only half a man without his woman. He cannot see into Heaven without a woman's eyes. He must ride on her Heavenly spirit to see all that Papa is involved in from eternity to eternity.
I write all this from visions. I know it is true because verses permeate my mind as the visions unfold. I am so happy to be a woman :)
Dreaming in December 2010
I've had many dreams of late. It's still early today. Maybe I'll remember last night's now.
Ah, yes. I saw as I prayed for son Adam a lot of bright tools of wisdom dropping on him from above. He was carried up off the ground as they permeated him. They looked like little parts of mini Play Mobil toys. Little black squares with 3 silver stripes on them, others in differing colors also fell on him. He shook a little, his eyes closed and mouth opened. All this while I verbalized silently that wisdom would pour down on him and overwhelm his person. Adam has been on my heart. I ache for him to draw near to You, Papa. He's missing out, and this is unacceptable!
Ah, yes. I saw as I prayed for son Adam a lot of bright tools of wisdom dropping on him from above. He was carried up off the ground as they permeated him. They looked like little parts of mini Play Mobil toys. Little black squares with 3 silver stripes on them, others in differing colors also fell on him. He shook a little, his eyes closed and mouth opened. All this while I verbalized silently that wisdom would pour down on him and overwhelm his person. Adam has been on my heart. I ache for him to draw near to You, Papa. He's missing out, and this is unacceptable!
Sunday, November 28, 2010
40 days of encounter journal
Bethel Church is doing a 40 days of encounter, which began just before Thanksgiving Day. I began this encounter after reading James Goll's book. Bethel is doing it according to James Goll's book as well. I like having others to do this with. Papa loves family efforts :) I noticed an increased awareness of details in my encounters. Neat :) Let's see if I can remember to record my encounters here.
Friday, November 26, 2010
Orphan spirit
Papa has been teaching me much about human behavior of late. I'm perplexed with the way believers have conducted themselves in and outside of the church. I'm attached to a group of churches that shared the same Heavenly vision and Word back in the '90's. I'm too far from any of them to be part of their amazing ministries, but I find that it is enough to attach myself to the nearest one, and let them minister to me by internet. I'm so blessed. I am confirmed that I belong with them (Bethel Church, Redding, CA), as I dream similarly and in great detail, Papa's visions for us, one to one and as a church family. I've prayed for its leaders, burdened for mistakes I see being made, and then relieved and joyful as they publicly declare that that is changing now (wondering why they hadn't seen it until now). This is my ministry to Bethel Church. To intercede on their behalf. Really, this is the first time I've felt unity in any church I've belonged to the last 36 years. It's all good. And there's a great benefit to having a shepherd who comes from a long line of shepherds who knows how to be a father shepherd to a flock of sheep. He knows how not to be an orphan, but sometimes he forgets.
As I prayed that my shepherd would stop traveling so much, would pay attention to his flock himself, instead of leaving them to others not born for this fathering role, I felt so heavy with the burden. I had breakthrough this month. The busyness has been declared as a problem. People who are insecure and overwhelm themselves with busyness are those running from the cries of their orphan spirit. Even this shepherd admitted it. He has something to compare it to, and he doesn't like what he sees. Two weeks ago, he declared that he was stopping his travels by at least 30%. He gathered his flock together and encouraged them. The electricity was exciting amongst the flock who was hearing it. They were so excited about this. Gee, do you really think us that important?
Papa keeps things simple. Anything out of proportion is corrected and balance restored. Even a man of a long line of shepherds can forget who he is.
Papa, help me to not run from the cries of an orphan spirit. I belong to You. Thanks for clarifying the weirdness of disunity in the church. I like knowing it isn't my fault :)
As I prayed that my shepherd would stop traveling so much, would pay attention to his flock himself, instead of leaving them to others not born for this fathering role, I felt so heavy with the burden. I had breakthrough this month. The busyness has been declared as a problem. People who are insecure and overwhelm themselves with busyness are those running from the cries of their orphan spirit. Even this shepherd admitted it. He has something to compare it to, and he doesn't like what he sees. Two weeks ago, he declared that he was stopping his travels by at least 30%. He gathered his flock together and encouraged them. The electricity was exciting amongst the flock who was hearing it. They were so excited about this. Gee, do you really think us that important?
Papa keeps things simple. Anything out of proportion is corrected and balance restored. Even a man of a long line of shepherds can forget who he is.
Papa, help me to not run from the cries of an orphan spirit. I belong to You. Thanks for clarifying the weirdness of disunity in the church. I like knowing it isn't my fault :)
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Continue in these things
No matter what results, we continue working out all things. We pray healing for a sick one, and stop when they are healed, or else when their life is over here. We don't get disappointed nor discouraged from doing it again and again, when it is in our faces. We do life with joy in trouble and trouble in joy. Others' troubles are about us. Will we continue in these things, no matter what? Especially in the mystery of endings and answers.
I've seen cynical writings on believers' walls at FB. I first saw it in a young sour person. Apparently, his parents share his sour cynicism. I didn't see that coming. Papa, I break it in Jesus' name.
I've seen cynical writings on believers' walls at FB. I first saw it in a young sour person. Apparently, his parents share his sour cynicism. I didn't see that coming. Papa, I break it in Jesus' name.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Heartbreak, heartshake
Company, lost opportunities long-awaited; sabotage, betrayal, and then the reality check. My own ducks are all in a row, and count for a united Papa front (Papa, Jesus, Holy Spirit and me) as the rest of my human team pursues continually the vain life.
Consequently, I felt usurped, discounted, ignored and pushed out, in favor of the vain, time-consuming blatherings of displaced, ill-timed work passion and reminiscings. The labor force is a practical task which exists to finance life; it partners unequally with the real, exciting life Papa asks us to live out with Him.
As I tried to express the wrongness over this most recent spectacle, I saw in a vision little blue hamster balls with people in them in a rush; sharing in common work pursuits. Their balls knocked together, people inside them that Papa loves never ever coming into contact with one another; the knocks of their balls launching themselves in random directions. Relationships never made, people engagement starving to happen.
How could this scene have played out right in front of me?
All preparations for this good event came to naught. I was there to prepare, all doors open and welcoming. My house is safe, demon-free. Except for the ones welcomed in by others.
What bad can happen if one lets work obsession sin be? It's not okay. It's not okay to have an almost clean ministry and let one sin thrive. In fact, why call work sin sin? So much pleasure is derived from it; so much time invested in it.
Career threw up on Papa's clean house. That fight continues. It usurps opportunities to let Papa love overwhelmingly. It isolated two workaholics away from Him; instead, the passion and pursuit of career crash-landed on precious little time to share Papa, damming up the good channels of Heaven to them, and my heart was broken; shaken.
I'm soberly reminded that to pursue Papa is a daily choice. To love and care for His people correctly comes out of that choice to pursue Papa. There is no caring for people correctly when a life is consumed in the pursuit of vanity. Good News, life, freedom from the slave life explodes from a heart filled up with Papa's revelations, which are given as we pursue Him.
All that is important here on Earth is enormously clear to me. No one pursues vain interests in Heaven, to the neglect of our Papa. We all pursue Papa there. Together.
I have chosen Papa. He has shaped my life accordingly. So I am privileged to live, day by day, an incredibly blessed life. I travel to Heaven and back, ever full of Papa's stories and visions and words. I have shared these accounts with others, who think they're all pretty neat, and go back to vain pursuits. What is unattractive about this life of mine? Nothing. Yet they stand in the way of others I want to share it with; knowing, blocking my efforts, somehow ashamed of being privy to Papa's secrets via my life. What will connect Heaven to Earth for them?
More praying, more begging Papa to help. But He won't make us pursue Him. He never does. After all, what earthly papa wants to pursue potential sons and daughters who don't want to be pursued? Papa does. He knows who is hiding their hearts, sometimes long in life. He pursues them to the death bed. I guess I shall too :)
I share this kind of lifestyle with an amazing global family. What an amazing opportunity it is to be part of something so large! I'm glad I chose You, Papa. Jesus, my love, You made it all possible. Holy Spirit, You take me to amazing places in the Heavens, give me dreams and unite willing people from all locations in time and beyond; and beyond my wildest imagination, into a glorious, transforming Earth life.
Even as I write Mouse Trap 2, I've discovered that what I wrote last year (2009) about Papa's house, my visions about His Heavenly library, is being done on earth very similarly. Papa's projects are revealed in the dreams and visions of James Goll, one of my favorite people. Joy, bittersweet. I have no one to share this detailed confirmation of my own creative writing ministry in this place that I live. Patmos should be the name of this place. It is a Patmos for me.
Consequently, I felt usurped, discounted, ignored and pushed out, in favor of the vain, time-consuming blatherings of displaced, ill-timed work passion and reminiscings. The labor force is a practical task which exists to finance life; it partners unequally with the real, exciting life Papa asks us to live out with Him.
As I tried to express the wrongness over this most recent spectacle, I saw in a vision little blue hamster balls with people in them in a rush; sharing in common work pursuits. Their balls knocked together, people inside them that Papa loves never ever coming into contact with one another; the knocks of their balls launching themselves in random directions. Relationships never made, people engagement starving to happen.
How could this scene have played out right in front of me?
All preparations for this good event came to naught. I was there to prepare, all doors open and welcoming. My house is safe, demon-free. Except for the ones welcomed in by others.
What bad can happen if one lets work obsession sin be? It's not okay. It's not okay to have an almost clean ministry and let one sin thrive. In fact, why call work sin sin? So much pleasure is derived from it; so much time invested in it.
Career threw up on Papa's clean house. That fight continues. It usurps opportunities to let Papa love overwhelmingly. It isolated two workaholics away from Him; instead, the passion and pursuit of career crash-landed on precious little time to share Papa, damming up the good channels of Heaven to them, and my heart was broken; shaken.
I'm soberly reminded that to pursue Papa is a daily choice. To love and care for His people correctly comes out of that choice to pursue Papa. There is no caring for people correctly when a life is consumed in the pursuit of vanity. Good News, life, freedom from the slave life explodes from a heart filled up with Papa's revelations, which are given as we pursue Him.
All that is important here on Earth is enormously clear to me. No one pursues vain interests in Heaven, to the neglect of our Papa. We all pursue Papa there. Together.
I have chosen Papa. He has shaped my life accordingly. So I am privileged to live, day by day, an incredibly blessed life. I travel to Heaven and back, ever full of Papa's stories and visions and words. I have shared these accounts with others, who think they're all pretty neat, and go back to vain pursuits. What is unattractive about this life of mine? Nothing. Yet they stand in the way of others I want to share it with; knowing, blocking my efforts, somehow ashamed of being privy to Papa's secrets via my life. What will connect Heaven to Earth for them?
More praying, more begging Papa to help. But He won't make us pursue Him. He never does. After all, what earthly papa wants to pursue potential sons and daughters who don't want to be pursued? Papa does. He knows who is hiding their hearts, sometimes long in life. He pursues them to the death bed. I guess I shall too :)
I share this kind of lifestyle with an amazing global family. What an amazing opportunity it is to be part of something so large! I'm glad I chose You, Papa. Jesus, my love, You made it all possible. Holy Spirit, You take me to amazing places in the Heavens, give me dreams and unite willing people from all locations in time and beyond; and beyond my wildest imagination, into a glorious, transforming Earth life.
Even as I write Mouse Trap 2, I've discovered that what I wrote last year (2009) about Papa's house, my visions about His Heavenly library, is being done on earth very similarly. Papa's projects are revealed in the dreams and visions of James Goll, one of my favorite people. Joy, bittersweet. I have no one to share this detailed confirmation of my own creative writing ministry in this place that I live. Patmos should be the name of this place. It is a Patmos for me.
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Maria Clara
A prayer chain is formed for Maria Clara. It goes to Colombia, SA to different continents, so that she is covered. I feel especially close to her right now. Last night, I saw her mother's face in glory before my eyes, even as I brushed my teeth. My prayers are with her. Whenever I think of her, I pray. It is her time to heal :)
The cousins are all praying.
I love You, Papa. Come help.
The cousins are all praying.
I love You, Papa. Come help.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Living the Life
I get so wrapped up in the awe of having my Papa by my side that I forget the everyday ministry that is my life. The best part is the everyday where Papa brings encounters. Jesus and Sarayu always with Him, remind me that encounters are the grand toppings, the ministries that bless all involved; the Good News of the gospel displayed. I'm living the life we are all called to live. Imagine if the world were filled with everyday people who know how to be :)
With that introduction, I'll try to remember to post my everydays.
With that introduction, I'll try to remember to post my everydays.
Friday, November 5, 2010
Simplicity
We are not complicated. Fearfully and wonderfully made, but not complicated.
We haven't been given a heavy burden to carry out, but rather power to help Papa carry out His single, amazing plan within a time frame. Even that's a choice. And if it gets heavy, we're doing it wrong.
Stewardship is not a matter of tithing 10%, it is the way we handle the gifts Papa has handed us. Tithing is part of the OT law. Why is that so hard to accept? Papa is happy with us loving one another and loving Him. Passionately. The more we get to know one another, the more we appreciate the relationship. Sometimes that growth in friendship is misinterpreted as something quite evil by the very ones we invest in. Fear of intimacy. Get over it. Love is simply love. Papa's love. The entire message Papa has for us is love Him, love people. Imagine if we just did it. They will know we are His by the way we love one another.
1 Corinthians 13, the love chapter says it all. Just do it. It is simple. Papa loves simplicity.
We haven't been given a heavy burden to carry out, but rather power to help Papa carry out His single, amazing plan within a time frame. Even that's a choice. And if it gets heavy, we're doing it wrong.
Stewardship is not a matter of tithing 10%, it is the way we handle the gifts Papa has handed us. Tithing is part of the OT law. Why is that so hard to accept? Papa is happy with us loving one another and loving Him. Passionately. The more we get to know one another, the more we appreciate the relationship. Sometimes that growth in friendship is misinterpreted as something quite evil by the very ones we invest in. Fear of intimacy. Get over it. Love is simply love. Papa's love. The entire message Papa has for us is love Him, love people. Imagine if we just did it. They will know we are His by the way we love one another.
1 Corinthians 13, the love chapter says it all. Just do it. It is simple. Papa loves simplicity.
Monday, September 27, 2010
No TV for 2 weeks
This is what it was like for us for 10 years. There is such peace in the house. Such quiet. No wasted time, really. I can write, if I get enough sleep. I've been very tired and sleep escapes me. Tonight, I should sleep just fine.
I'm very aware of His Presence today
I want to write 'Papa is very close today' and then I realize He's always close. So I changed the title. I've had vivid moments of pure peace today. Before I nearly choked to death on two horse pills taken at the same time, and afterward. During the episode I was scared and nearly crying. I cried to Papa for help, believing Him for it, but I was afraid anyway. I massaged my throat and my gag reflex took over. I helped it along a little and coughed up the pills. My throat is swollen now. That's good. I need to listen more :)
Thursday, September 23, 2010
A word: HAZZUZ
Upon waking this morning, this word "HAZZUZ" came clearly in my mind in bold type. I've looked it up, but there is no such word on google and yahoo. It looks like 'Jesus', doesn't it? The Spanish pronunciation for Jesus is 'ha-ZOOS".
Immediately, I wanted to look at the letters. 'Z', a jagged letter for wind or lightning. and Holy Spirit, who is like wind, which could also be 'Z'. There are three Z's. One for each of The Three Beautiful Ones?
'H' is a cross. Jesus :)
'A' is alpha. First. That's Papa God.
'U' is 'unity'. This is my Papa, Jesus and Holy Spirit.
I almost missed Him, Them, imprinted on my brain.
The song I played in orchestra in high school, "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desire" comes to mind.
Yesterday, my heart was broken. But Jesus is my joy.
Immediately, I wanted to look at the letters. 'Z', a jagged letter for wind or lightning. and Holy Spirit, who is like wind, which could also be 'Z'. There are three Z's. One for each of The Three Beautiful Ones?
'H' is a cross. Jesus :)
'A' is alpha. First. That's Papa God.
'U' is 'unity'. This is my Papa, Jesus and Holy Spirit.
I almost missed Him, Them, imprinted on my brain.
The song I played in orchestra in high school, "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desire" comes to mind.
Yesterday, my heart was broken. But Jesus is my joy.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Papa's Definitions on Common Words
I'm learning to see things with spiritual eyes. Words we commonly use in time and space on Earth have eternal meaning too. Sometimes (or all the time) they clarify Papa's ways for us.
Timing - Papa's timing versus our timing. All things in good time. His timing is perfect, etc. It's best to receive a promise, take it to heart, eat it and not think about the WHEN of its fulfillment. I'm content that I received the promise. The blessing is the promise itself.
Time - Papa goes to and fro, inside and outside of time. We only know a life inside of time. But sometimes, I'm taken up. I return what seems like a moment later, but several hours have passed. That's me when spending time with Papa, Jesus and Sarayu.
Answers - They are both yes and no, and always answered by Papa. What I ask for might not be what I need. Papa's answers are perfect and complete for me.
Timing - Papa's timing versus our timing. All things in good time. His timing is perfect, etc. It's best to receive a promise, take it to heart, eat it and not think about the WHEN of its fulfillment. I'm content that I received the promise. The blessing is the promise itself.
Time - Papa goes to and fro, inside and outside of time. We only know a life inside of time. But sometimes, I'm taken up. I return what seems like a moment later, but several hours have passed. That's me when spending time with Papa, Jesus and Sarayu.
Answers - They are both yes and no, and always answered by Papa. What I ask for might not be what I need. Papa's answers are perfect and complete for me.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Intimate
How closely are you following Me? The foundation is laid. The musicians sing you into My presence, riding the waves of My mercy, I've shown you how to enter properly. Let go. There is nothing to fear. Just come.
Vessel
Why we're here. Vessels to connect people to Papa, Jesus and Sarayu. Clean vessels do it best. We sow into them so they can be vessels. More vessels to more people, Papa.
In everything I do, I must remember I am a vessel. It is my plumb line Earth to Heaven and Heaven to Earth. Like an elevator vessel attached at the outside of the tallest skyscraper shooting up and down, the vessel works best when its ears are open wide to what the Master would have me do today. Mmmm.... The highest calling ever. The worthy vessel.
In everything I do, I must remember I am a vessel. It is my plumb line Earth to Heaven and Heaven to Earth. Like an elevator vessel attached at the outside of the tallest skyscraper shooting up and down, the vessel works best when its ears are open wide to what the Master would have me do today. Mmmm.... The highest calling ever. The worthy vessel.
Friday, September 3, 2010
You Can't Love and Judge at the Same Time
So you must choose quite often in a single day that you are either going to love or judge. If you don't choose to love in advance, you will judge. Love with your spirit that is connected to Heaven. Don't judge with your mind that is stuck in the flesh.
Did you know that your mind is constantly at war with your spirit? The redeemed part of you lives in glory on Earth. Your spirit was awakened at your salvation. It lay dormant until that day. Papa breathed life into it and Papa entered in. But your flesh that used to rule you wants to be the boss. It sneaks out and usurps the right you want to do. It's nasty and selfish. It judges and curses people. Yuck. See it coming? Then center down. Close your eyes and say, "Papa, Jesus, Sarayu." Just keep saying it. Think about the Three Beautiful Ones every second you get. They come and you are in so much love with Them that you can't imagine ever wanting to judge. How nasty that is!
Guard your mind. Meditate on the Word. It is full of life. I feel like I'm getting a blood transfusion when I read it. The more I let it in, the more I'm transformed. Speak in tongues too. These are tools for life.
Did you know that your mind is constantly at war with your spirit? The redeemed part of you lives in glory on Earth. Your spirit was awakened at your salvation. It lay dormant until that day. Papa breathed life into it and Papa entered in. But your flesh that used to rule you wants to be the boss. It sneaks out and usurps the right you want to do. It's nasty and selfish. It judges and curses people. Yuck. See it coming? Then center down. Close your eyes and say, "Papa, Jesus, Sarayu." Just keep saying it. Think about the Three Beautiful Ones every second you get. They come and you are in so much love with Them that you can't imagine ever wanting to judge. How nasty that is!
Guard your mind. Meditate on the Word. It is full of life. I feel like I'm getting a blood transfusion when I read it. The more I let it in, the more I'm transformed. Speak in tongues too. These are tools for life.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
MT2 tracks
I'm in the thick of ending MT2, the sequel to my first book. Writing almost daily, getting much done, integrating 'Interim' into it, which is a huge deal.
Ending a novel takes some intricate weaving. I find that just writing when stuck is not a waste of time. The interim section was born out of writer's block, and it wove right into the story today. I see how JRR Tolkien could have unpublished partial stories all over his office. Mine is messy with loose end parts. I have 8 unfinished works that I work on when suddenly I remember their contents. Crazy, huh? I plan on finishing up each manuscript. One has to be retyped from thermal paper. I wrote it in the 80's. My style hasn't changed much. I'm just more comfortable writing my visions. Bethel gave me that. Thank you.
I'll try to remember to keep this journey with MT2 updated here.
Ending a novel takes some intricate weaving. I find that just writing when stuck is not a waste of time. The interim section was born out of writer's block, and it wove right into the story today. I see how JRR Tolkien could have unpublished partial stories all over his office. Mine is messy with loose end parts. I have 8 unfinished works that I work on when suddenly I remember their contents. Crazy, huh? I plan on finishing up each manuscript. One has to be retyped from thermal paper. I wrote it in the 80's. My style hasn't changed much. I'm just more comfortable writing my visions. Bethel gave me that. Thank you.
I'll try to remember to keep this journey with MT2 updated here.
Mentor - A Word
'Mentor' is a word in my thoughts the last couple of days. Someone said something tonight about what we do next after we finally feel comfortable with Papa. Some I've known forever say they didn't learn about Papa from me, but from another friendship that began when they were young. This baffles me. All my life, to pass on my faith is what I do, and some didn't hear me. How can this be?
I'm dedicated to Papa, am comfortable in His presence. We are not all spiritual mothers or fathers to young people. You know what I'm good at? Writing my heart. I have good feedback as an author. Papa gave that to me in 2nd grade. I've been singing to Him ONLY since I found out who He is and what Jesus did for me.
One of Bill Johnson's sons said that his dad never told him he 'should' be or do anything. He didn't want to interfere with Papa's work in his life. Bingo. Bill is a real mentor. He's known only Papa since before his birth, as did 5 generations before him. We're fooling ourselves if we think Papa hasn't appointed good mentors for us. Don't try to be what you're not. First generation believers are not mentors. It's just common sense.
Kris Vallotton, since first meeting Bill, has wanted to be just like him. Bill was the first person he met that he wanted to be like. I met Bill only 3 years ago. I was 50. But it's true for me too. Bill shares his heart, his handling of tough situations, his ministry, his struggles. His handling of life is for me. What a great mentor!
I'm dedicated to Papa, am comfortable in His presence. We are not all spiritual mothers or fathers to young people. You know what I'm good at? Writing my heart. I have good feedback as an author. Papa gave that to me in 2nd grade. I've been singing to Him ONLY since I found out who He is and what Jesus did for me.
One of Bill Johnson's sons said that his dad never told him he 'should' be or do anything. He didn't want to interfere with Papa's work in his life. Bingo. Bill is a real mentor. He's known only Papa since before his birth, as did 5 generations before him. We're fooling ourselves if we think Papa hasn't appointed good mentors for us. Don't try to be what you're not. First generation believers are not mentors. It's just common sense.
Kris Vallotton, since first meeting Bill, has wanted to be just like him. Bill was the first person he met that he wanted to be like. I met Bill only 3 years ago. I was 50. But it's true for me too. Bill shares his heart, his handling of tough situations, his ministry, his struggles. His handling of life is for me. What a great mentor!
Friday, August 13, 2010
Speaking in tongues unawares
I am aware of the thinness of the veil between Heaven and earth dimensions. I see a pressing of Heaven on the earth, much like a mom in labor, her unborn child pushing downward inside a thin membrane. Earth cannot stop it. Birth must happen, and soon.
So when Papa whispers to me in that space between sleepiness and bedtime, I'm no longer surprised. My spirit recognizes Him. Holy Spirit, who comes to give me a word, even while I brush my teeth with a noisy electric toothbrush. I'm nodding in agreement, in enlightenment of something new and fantastic to me. Always based in the wonderful truth of Scripture, my mind heads there to review it again, and I am undone.
This has been my nightly visitation. I am so blessed to have spiritual ears wide awake while my body is weakened by the activities of the day; the best time to receive precious Papa gifts for me.
Last night was fun. A word I've been hearing is 'segue'. All this week I've meditated on this word, heard it in the news or elsewhere as well. A newscaster can't qualify for the job unless he knows how to segue from one topic to the next, in order to hold the viewers' attention. All topics handled by the presenter, all chained end to end to hold our attention.
Papa has done this for us. Will we let Heaven and earth coexist, seeing how Heaven has immense impact on every detail of our existence? Heaven is not confused nor nervous about any outcome, because we exist underneath it, the entire human plan, and always has its way. And we are in this plan, all of us, past, present and future, all of us. We came long after it became. It was a brilliant, perfect thought Papa had. We were a part of that original thought, but born later into existence. So Heaven segues in and throughout our past, present and future, easily living out with us, before and after us, until we see it clearly with our own eyes, which is yet to come. Soon. All events connect. All tragedy is redeemed. The quality of people we become living out joy in trouble and trouble in joy makes us a grateful bunch. We realize we have a loving Papa who takes care of us. We have an easier time of it if we will choose Him, meeting Him halfway. Then we know we prayed and He answered again and again until death. When we don't choose Him, He takes care of us anyway, and we think it is luck or fate. People abandon Papa. Papa never abandons anyone. Look at your life and realize in every detail, Papa is there, loving you. And you'll be okay.
Last night as I was going to bed, I began speaking in tongues unawares. I realized I was doing so and smiled as I continued. My spirit communed with Papa and I was lifted up as tongues became louder and quicker, intense and praising. I love these times. I was downloaded from Heaven something new. The battle for love, to love even in the most intense of circumstances. The only way to reach people; we're the only ones who can, no matter how seemingly unlovable they are. What a joy to continue in unconditional love!
Segue love Heaven to earth. Stitch them tightly together until the seams disappear.
So when Papa whispers to me in that space between sleepiness and bedtime, I'm no longer surprised. My spirit recognizes Him. Holy Spirit, who comes to give me a word, even while I brush my teeth with a noisy electric toothbrush. I'm nodding in agreement, in enlightenment of something new and fantastic to me. Always based in the wonderful truth of Scripture, my mind heads there to review it again, and I am undone.
This has been my nightly visitation. I am so blessed to have spiritual ears wide awake while my body is weakened by the activities of the day; the best time to receive precious Papa gifts for me.
Last night was fun. A word I've been hearing is 'segue'. All this week I've meditated on this word, heard it in the news or elsewhere as well. A newscaster can't qualify for the job unless he knows how to segue from one topic to the next, in order to hold the viewers' attention. All topics handled by the presenter, all chained end to end to hold our attention.
Papa has done this for us. Will we let Heaven and earth coexist, seeing how Heaven has immense impact on every detail of our existence? Heaven is not confused nor nervous about any outcome, because we exist underneath it, the entire human plan, and always has its way. And we are in this plan, all of us, past, present and future, all of us. We came long after it became. It was a brilliant, perfect thought Papa had. We were a part of that original thought, but born later into existence. So Heaven segues in and throughout our past, present and future, easily living out with us, before and after us, until we see it clearly with our own eyes, which is yet to come. Soon. All events connect. All tragedy is redeemed. The quality of people we become living out joy in trouble and trouble in joy makes us a grateful bunch. We realize we have a loving Papa who takes care of us. We have an easier time of it if we will choose Him, meeting Him halfway. Then we know we prayed and He answered again and again until death. When we don't choose Him, He takes care of us anyway, and we think it is luck or fate. People abandon Papa. Papa never abandons anyone. Look at your life and realize in every detail, Papa is there, loving you. And you'll be okay.
Last night as I was going to bed, I began speaking in tongues unawares. I realized I was doing so and smiled as I continued. My spirit communed with Papa and I was lifted up as tongues became louder and quicker, intense and praising. I love these times. I was downloaded from Heaven something new. The battle for love, to love even in the most intense of circumstances. The only way to reach people; we're the only ones who can, no matter how seemingly unlovable they are. What a joy to continue in unconditional love!
Segue love Heaven to earth. Stitch them tightly together until the seams disappear.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
My Life Makes Sense In Jesus' Name
I'm tempted to insert 'only' into the title of this post. "My life makes sense ONLY in Jesus' name. But I don't want to throw anyone off. So let me explain:
When I look at my history, my path, those around me who cross my path up to the present day, I realize life has been very different than I could ever have imagined or planned. The only time I evaluate my life is when a person feels the need to judge it. He/she hasn't been on my path, doesn't wish to hear the testimony it has given me to this point in life, but rather prefers to do a little plain math and deduces that a couple of major upsets in my life could only be caused by me in some way. Different people see different pieces of information about me, each one coming up with a different judgment; even opposite judgments. So I find myself looking back to try to see what I missed; what they see. That is confusing and not worthy of my time.
But when I remember to apply this particular tool, "My life makes sense in Jesus' name,' confusion is turned into peace, and all of my life, once again, makes perfect sense. When my spirit communes with Holy Spirit, I see the tapestry of my life, all a beautiful weave, as it is meant to be. Using this tool, I have access to Papa's point of view. I'm seeing the same picture of my history in a Papa flow, His sovereignty in it is everywhere throughout my life, and the beautiful tapestry is set before me making perfect sense. The more I look at it, the more the details of it, Papa's care for me, become obvious. He really is a Master Weaver.
From the flesh or the mind, life makes little sense. When believers and/or non-believers judge someone else's life, they are just letting their flesh, their logical minds, evaluate you with partial evidence. This judging habit is sin and should have nothing to do with you or me.
Aren't you glad Papa knows everything? We only have one all-knowing Papa, who sees our hearts, communes with our spirits, and knows without a doubt that we are good. He doesn't judge us on limited information about us. He sees all of us and STILL doesn't judge. Jesus died for all of us. Leave the sin of judging at the cross where it belongs, and has belonged for 2000 years.
Jesus spilt His blood so that we could experience powerful lives as Papa's royal sons and daughters. We extend our hands over an ailing one and pray his healing, his fullness restored, any place, any time. We do His Good News, His Gospel because of the blood. Papa is weaving all of us a wonderful tapestry.
When I look at my history, my path, those around me who cross my path up to the present day, I realize life has been very different than I could ever have imagined or planned. The only time I evaluate my life is when a person feels the need to judge it. He/she hasn't been on my path, doesn't wish to hear the testimony it has given me to this point in life, but rather prefers to do a little plain math and deduces that a couple of major upsets in my life could only be caused by me in some way. Different people see different pieces of information about me, each one coming up with a different judgment; even opposite judgments. So I find myself looking back to try to see what I missed; what they see. That is confusing and not worthy of my time.
But when I remember to apply this particular tool, "My life makes sense in Jesus' name,' confusion is turned into peace, and all of my life, once again, makes perfect sense. When my spirit communes with Holy Spirit, I see the tapestry of my life, all a beautiful weave, as it is meant to be. Using this tool, I have access to Papa's point of view. I'm seeing the same picture of my history in a Papa flow, His sovereignty in it is everywhere throughout my life, and the beautiful tapestry is set before me making perfect sense. The more I look at it, the more the details of it, Papa's care for me, become obvious. He really is a Master Weaver.
From the flesh or the mind, life makes little sense. When believers and/or non-believers judge someone else's life, they are just letting their flesh, their logical minds, evaluate you with partial evidence. This judging habit is sin and should have nothing to do with you or me.
Aren't you glad Papa knows everything? We only have one all-knowing Papa, who sees our hearts, communes with our spirits, and knows without a doubt that we are good. He doesn't judge us on limited information about us. He sees all of us and STILL doesn't judge. Jesus died for all of us. Leave the sin of judging at the cross where it belongs, and has belonged for 2000 years.
Jesus spilt His blood so that we could experience powerful lives as Papa's royal sons and daughters. We extend our hands over an ailing one and pray his healing, his fullness restored, any place, any time. We do His Good News, His Gospel because of the blood. Papa is weaving all of us a wonderful tapestry.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Today, something is in the wind...
Just recording the sense of 'something' being in the wind. This is a calm time, like the eye of a tornado. Meanwhile, I work on MT2. My brain is on fully. Taking pycnogenol for 2 weeks now. Weaning off the other vitamins. Money is tight. But my senses are heightened. I love being tuned into Heaven :)
Friday, July 30, 2010
Lava Wall Dream
On July 30, 2010, I had an intricate dream with words following, involving a wall of 'touchable' lava and smoke. I recorded it in my dream book and will copy it here now.
Lava flow, black smoke -- a wall of it. Someone died. Family wanted to take ashes to Hana. Not thinking of the smoke. Divers in garb rush past me to the water anyway. Surfers rush to the water. Someone convinces the son of the man lost not to go to Hana.
I woke up this morning to cane ash. Can't smell it inside. Saw an actor interviewed on Letterman last night talking about scattering his dad's ashes overseas. Could be related to my dream. But the different reactions to the wall of smoke draws me to the people in the dream. When the warning signs are there, some respond with caution; others with the thrill of danger. And rush in.
Then I got a vision of swimming through molten lava toward Papa. Forget hostile reactions. Just swim. Forget the intensity of the lava. Papa calls. Just swim. Others are drawn because they search. Invite them to join you. This is what it's all about. The miracles confirm the gospel.
We operate on a basis of belief or unbelief. Marriage works or doesn't because we choose to believe in it. Young or old, belief is the reason we stay. Believing in Papa's constant presence keeps me there. Because I stay, I see more and more. My visions are expanding. If I get off, I merely step back in and continue on. The swim is hot. Intense. And worth it. Papa is it.
Lava flow, black smoke -- a wall of it. Someone died. Family wanted to take ashes to Hana. Not thinking of the smoke. Divers in garb rush past me to the water anyway. Surfers rush to the water. Someone convinces the son of the man lost not to go to Hana.
I woke up this morning to cane ash. Can't smell it inside. Saw an actor interviewed on Letterman last night talking about scattering his dad's ashes overseas. Could be related to my dream. But the different reactions to the wall of smoke draws me to the people in the dream. When the warning signs are there, some respond with caution; others with the thrill of danger. And rush in.
Then I got a vision of swimming through molten lava toward Papa. Forget hostile reactions. Just swim. Forget the intensity of the lava. Papa calls. Just swim. Others are drawn because they search. Invite them to join you. This is what it's all about. The miracles confirm the gospel.
We operate on a basis of belief or unbelief. Marriage works or doesn't because we choose to believe in it. Young or old, belief is the reason we stay. Believing in Papa's constant presence keeps me there. Because I stay, I see more and more. My visions are expanding. If I get off, I merely step back in and continue on. The swim is hot. Intense. And worth it. Papa is it.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Physical Therapy and me
On July 12, 2010, I began another physical therapy regime. I'll be going twice a week for a month. I've been twice to therapy and I am happy beyond words about what is happening to my body -- finally.
With a wide range of accidents since age 4, who knew about having physical therapy to get all the physical ducks in a row? Mostly my spine. I don't even know this new guy's name, but he's new to the islands. And he was not happy about the absence of physical therapy after all my accidents, and/or the really, really WRONG and MISTAKEN trainers and physical therapists of my past. I feel like Job, finally allowed to heal after all these years of physical trouble. The right person came along and is setting me straight. Thank you, Papa.
My PT's main focus is the spine. If that is lined up right, my organs, muscles, tendons and vascular system will be happy. It's not only knowing what's wrong, but how to fix it. For the first time ever, I know how to align my own spine. It is very basic and so simple that I am baffled that the trained helpers of my past had no clue about this. I'm very happy that Papa has given me this PT.
I have been prayed over a lot. I have done the training routines. The prayers were good. But where I needed to contribute to continued healing was so lacking. I knew something was wrong. I was given so much dumb advice (I tried every one too), but I just needed someone who was trained properly in this field to pass on what he knew. I'm healing now.
I see a parallel lesson in my life with spiritual training. I started well, ended up following my sister into a church where it would be grilled into me how powerful Papa's bible story is, but Holy Spirit was left out of everything I learned. He spoke to me the day I became His daughter. Papa speaking is ignored still today in this church. I left a few years later, thankful for the Word, and into Papa's mission field on earth. I can't help wonder if I had had the proper training (the right training was available but a mile from my church), what kind of believer I would be today. I struggle with wrong training, wrong evangelism training, people interaction training, all things I wish I could forget. I had no secret place to go, but now I do. I know what to do now because I have been retrained. Apparently, the Kingdom of God is bigger than I was previously taught :) Such power, mighty glorious power, fiery healing even from my hands, tongues of glory communing with Holy Spirit, praying with Him, fellowshipping in Papa's arms and at my dining table every day. All people precious to me, no matter how they fall. They are dear to Papa, Jesus and Holy Spirit. My love for them is unconditional because of Papa. I don't have to try to love. I do because I am with Them.
Proper training is a beautiful thing :)
With a wide range of accidents since age 4, who knew about having physical therapy to get all the physical ducks in a row? Mostly my spine. I don't even know this new guy's name, but he's new to the islands. And he was not happy about the absence of physical therapy after all my accidents, and/or the really, really WRONG and MISTAKEN trainers and physical therapists of my past. I feel like Job, finally allowed to heal after all these years of physical trouble. The right person came along and is setting me straight. Thank you, Papa.
My PT's main focus is the spine. If that is lined up right, my organs, muscles, tendons and vascular system will be happy. It's not only knowing what's wrong, but how to fix it. For the first time ever, I know how to align my own spine. It is very basic and so simple that I am baffled that the trained helpers of my past had no clue about this. I'm very happy that Papa has given me this PT.
I have been prayed over a lot. I have done the training routines. The prayers were good. But where I needed to contribute to continued healing was so lacking. I knew something was wrong. I was given so much dumb advice (I tried every one too), but I just needed someone who was trained properly in this field to pass on what he knew. I'm healing now.
I see a parallel lesson in my life with spiritual training. I started well, ended up following my sister into a church where it would be grilled into me how powerful Papa's bible story is, but Holy Spirit was left out of everything I learned. He spoke to me the day I became His daughter. Papa speaking is ignored still today in this church. I left a few years later, thankful for the Word, and into Papa's mission field on earth. I can't help wonder if I had had the proper training (the right training was available but a mile from my church), what kind of believer I would be today. I struggle with wrong training, wrong evangelism training, people interaction training, all things I wish I could forget. I had no secret place to go, but now I do. I know what to do now because I have been retrained. Apparently, the Kingdom of God is bigger than I was previously taught :) Such power, mighty glorious power, fiery healing even from my hands, tongues of glory communing with Holy Spirit, praying with Him, fellowshipping in Papa's arms and at my dining table every day. All people precious to me, no matter how they fall. They are dear to Papa, Jesus and Holy Spirit. My love for them is unconditional because of Papa. I don't have to try to love. I do because I am with Them.
Proper training is a beautiful thing :)
Three Tree Point - a word
I've been getting words just before retiring at night. The last word was with this picture of an area called Three Tree Point in Burien, WA. The sea view is breathtaking and nearly perfect. Other areas that have sea views along the WA coast are not so perfect. There are power lines and rooftops; congested areas that block the beautiful Sound.
The image I got was of my eyes adjusting to this Three Tree Point view. It is the place I need to ground myself in order to see clearly what Papa has for me. It is the place of His Presence, no clutter or baggage obstructing His perfect will; what He is doing, which is always on time, every detail attended to.
In life, when things get in the way, I need to remember this visual; this perfect place, no matter what appears before me, because that is where I need to be in my spirit, where Holy Spirit is also, in order to handle rightly the daily things that cross my path. It's Philippians: Run the race set before me, keeping my eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of my faith, who, for the glory set before Him, endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at Papa's right hand. I'm going to a place of unimaginable beauty. The vividness of that beautiful place needs to be present in the minutest details of my life here on earth.
The image I got was of my eyes adjusting to this Three Tree Point view. It is the place I need to ground myself in order to see clearly what Papa has for me. It is the place of His Presence, no clutter or baggage obstructing His perfect will; what He is doing, which is always on time, every detail attended to.
In life, when things get in the way, I need to remember this visual; this perfect place, no matter what appears before me, because that is where I need to be in my spirit, where Holy Spirit is also, in order to handle rightly the daily things that cross my path. It's Philippians: Run the race set before me, keeping my eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of my faith, who, for the glory set before Him, endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at Papa's right hand. I'm going to a place of unimaginable beauty. The vividness of that beautiful place needs to be present in the minutest details of my life here on earth.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Life Tools
I love life tools. Not just any life tools. There are many out there. But tools taught by people who are excellent mentors, who know how to do life, and miracles and healings follow them wherever they go. Papa confirms good teaching with miracles and healings. So this is the first life tool. Learn how to do life from mentors like these, and leave the other ones in the dust. It takes a lifetime to glean good stuff from good mentors. We have no time to waste on the others.
This page is dedicated to life tools.
This page is dedicated to life tools.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Parental Units
My siblings and I are first generation believers. We had a great-great-grandfather, Abraham, who prayed for his family. I wonder if he knew his prayers would go far into the future? He had (according to my father), only one child who loved Papa. That would be Arlonzo, who has left a great legacy. But only one of his sons would follow Papa. That is Lloyd Maywood, who has an amazing legacy. Lloyd's brother is my grampa. My grampa left Papa, married and raised five carnal kids. My dad is one. But somehow, Papa saved me and most of my siblings to the loud protests of our parents. That generational curse indeed stops like magic with Jesus' blood covering on us.
Image of ladder hooks
I miss being part of a church family and was thinking how much time we wasted being in the wrong places the last 3 decades. Then I was doing laundry when I had an image of ladder hooks. I had climbed high on the ladder, faltered and fell, but instead of falling far, I landed on a lower hook and was grounded there. I fell a few more times, but always managed to get caught on another ladder hook. All at different heights.
Interpretation: Each church we belonged to benefited us in some way, infusing wisdom that we would need later on. We moved forward on our paths, to different fellowships as our lives moved geographically, and though nearly all the churches we attended pushed us away, we fell backward onto wisdom we gleaned from other churches, so we didn't fall far. We ended up learning important lessons, survived our testing, and grew spiritually just a little more. It seems we enter into a new fellowship, infuse and empower people, get treated like 'kill the messengers' and move on. The rungs keep us from falling. We love the rungs. They are Papa's truths that outlast silly people who stiffen their necks to Papa's revelations through His people. May the messengers always be caught on the rungs :)
Interpretation: Each church we belonged to benefited us in some way, infusing wisdom that we would need later on. We moved forward on our paths, to different fellowships as our lives moved geographically, and though nearly all the churches we attended pushed us away, we fell backward onto wisdom we gleaned from other churches, so we didn't fall far. We ended up learning important lessons, survived our testing, and grew spiritually just a little more. It seems we enter into a new fellowship, infuse and empower people, get treated like 'kill the messengers' and move on. The rungs keep us from falling. We love the rungs. They are Papa's truths that outlast silly people who stiffen their necks to Papa's revelations through His people. May the messengers always be caught on the rungs :)
Friday, July 2, 2010
Dreams and Words
A series of dreams and words came to me beginning before midnight last night. I wish I'd been ready to write them down. I usually have a pen and a dream journal at my bedside, but not this time. Rats :) I'll try to remember them today.
It could be that the dreams all fit together in one word, a lesson I'll need for later, or a warning.
The first was a word I received as I stumbled toward bed, being very sleepy. What was it?
When I got in bed, I had a feeling of weightlessness and total peace. Deep joy. Papa had come. He is pleased with me. He likes this new work; this website. Kewl. I rest with Him, tell Him how much I love Him. His voice is low and peaceful. He speaks to me reassurances of His love for me. That makes me happy. I wish I could remember the dialogue. I fell asleep.
I dreamt about blue sharks and then loan sharks. Something upsetting our finances and my husband deciding to take care of it on his own. I watch him walk toward folks who don't have our best interest in mind. Hmmm...
The next dreams are similar. Losing possessions. One dream was of losing a movie camera and the other dream of losing a digital camera. Each is left behind on a table.
I put all dreams of one night in one entry to sort them out. If I learn what they are, I can use the comment box to update them.
It could be that the dreams all fit together in one word, a lesson I'll need for later, or a warning.
The first was a word I received as I stumbled toward bed, being very sleepy. What was it?
When I got in bed, I had a feeling of weightlessness and total peace. Deep joy. Papa had come. He is pleased with me. He likes this new work; this website. Kewl. I rest with Him, tell Him how much I love Him. His voice is low and peaceful. He speaks to me reassurances of His love for me. That makes me happy. I wish I could remember the dialogue. I fell asleep.
I dreamt about blue sharks and then loan sharks. Something upsetting our finances and my husband deciding to take care of it on his own. I watch him walk toward folks who don't have our best interest in mind. Hmmm...
The next dreams are similar. Losing possessions. One dream was of losing a movie camera and the other dream of losing a digital camera. Each is left behind on a table.
I put all dreams of one night in one entry to sort them out. If I learn what they are, I can use the comment box to update them.
Healing Miracles
Having a checkered medical history, I have a history of being healed. For each ailment I'm healed from, I carry the power to heal others with the same ailment. There are other areas in my body that are not healed yet. But I am not discouraged. I carry Papa's authority to heal, so I lay hands on when the opportunity arises, so grateful for Papa's decision to include me in yet another one of His interventions. His enthusiasm for me and you is so big, His desire to have us join Him in miracles and healings is the highest honor. We just need to say YES to Him. Everything about Him is YES. I guess I can begin to record them here too :)
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Yielding in Chaos
I wait for Papa today in many situations I find myself involved in. It is all good. Some things in my life await addressing. I dare not move until He works out the impossibilities and His strategies are clear. And I know His timing is perfect.
Worship that is Timeless
We belonged to the Vineyard Christian Fellowship in Santa Maria, California in the 1980's. Worship, as a rule, lasted as long as four hours, yet time seemed to disappear for us. Our children in Sunday School were fine, as if we were gone for just a bit. During worship, Holy Spirit would come and we'd leave the earth, fly up to Heaven with Him, and right into Papa's throne room. Our time at VCF Santa Maria ended with an overseas move, but we have been back to visit. Papa's presence is vivid in gatherings like theirs, where people are yielded to His presence. We wait for Him. Papa goes where He wishes. I love to visit churches where He shows up regularly. We now journey to Bethel Church in Redding, California. Papa's life is big there too. We will soon move closer to Redding. Back on the mainland, we will be able to visit other places in the US where Papa shows up large. From Canada to Florida, Missouri, Las Vegas, Nevada, Pasadena, CA, to name a few. Bethel Church will be the closest geographically for us.
Creative Prayer
Without faith, hope and love for every person, there is no creative imagination, nor creative, visionary prayer for them. We recreate our ugly past by remembering it in episodes, as Holy Spirit leads, and making it right. See our always good Papa, Jesus and Holy Spirit amidst one episode of chaos. See the chaos as They do. See it through Their loving eyes and then inject faith, hope and love into the memory and watch as it become for the first time an event full of joy. I've done this exercise of faith over and over again this year. How wonderfully it works! It is 1 Corinthians 13 at its best :)
My book, "Mouse Trap"
I wrote this internet thriller a few years ago and am presently writing its sequel. I wouldn't change a thing about it, though the sequel reflects my journey much further along my path to Papa's throne room. You can preview it by clicking on its link on the right.
Yoga and me
What I like best about yoga is its ability to go into the sleeping places and wake them up. Then, voila, what makes me limp is gone; those deep places I cannot identify awake with a particular stretch. I don't know which one did it. All I know is I'm standing straight again. Doing yoga is an act of faith. I put myself out there as best I can and it takes what I've got to offer and fixes me better than any acupuncturist, chiropractor, or physical therapist can. It is my experience.
The Four of Us
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